How Quickly Things can change

I'm not even sure where to start with this post given my last one had such great news.  This one will have zero great news.  Maybe 2 weeks ago mom had chemo for what seems to be the last time.  It really knocked her down.  She got thrush last week and somehow we went from that to sepsis.  Lisa and Dean were visiting over the weekend and mom got more and more uncomfortable and unable to eat or drink.  Monday she was very weak and she went back to the ER and was admitted again.  She was dehydrated and her blood counts were critically low if even registering.  Pretty much zeros.  She got another blood transfusion and started getting antibiotics and shots to boost her white blood count.  Tuesday her DR called me (per her instructions) and was blunt in letting me know that had she not come in she would have died.  He also was very clear in letting me know that things will not be improving for the most part.  Best case scenerio now is that mom beats the sepsis and gets her immune system up enough to come home.  When she does get home hospice care will be involved because options for more treatment have been taken off the table because her immune system has been officially destroyed.  As a family we are in agreement that we keep mom as comfortable as possible so she can have quality time left with friends and family.  There is always the outside chance that things could turn around and she would feel up to more chemo but at this point that is a very outside chance.  The side affects at this point have become worse than the cancer itself.  We are all kind of in a tailspin right now.  Mom did so well for so long I think we might have all been oblivious to her cancer and especially this happening.  Her DR always said it could turn on a dime and that it did.  None of us are really ok but we are committed to making sure mom is comfortable and getting exactly what she wants.  Dad was unbelievebly strong yesterday in the meeting at the hospital.  I was the one who was screaming in my head for everyone to get out of my way so I could just breathe.  Scip seems lost.  And mom isn't ready.  She looks beautiful as always.  That was the strangest part was looking at her looking so good even in the drab hospital gown and hearing the DRs say to prepare for end of life.  This is all so F - ed up and truly insane.  Moms sister Lisa is here as well and moving into our house today.  Dad has requested his privacy at the house to do what he needs to do.  Any visitors are welcome at our house or my brothers.  I promise to be better about updates.  Mom has touched so many hearts and its rather overwhelming to her (not so much me b/c I know how fabulous and infectious her love and friendship is).  Thank you all for everything you have given our family.  I know the fight isn't over just yet and I don't mean to sound so grim and hopeless but